I've become tired of my own voice. It seems that I'm always writing motivational things here, usually aimed at myself. My life is pretty chaotic right now... I don't have a regualar sleep schedule, I don't have consistent work, and worst of all, I don't have a consistant paycheck. I'm trying to get accepted to a master's program overseas, either in Austria or Germany... but even if I do get accepted, I don't know how I'm going to pay for it. The world is one great question mark for me right now, and I have nothing tethering me to anything. I don't know how to pick a direction... right now I'm stuck in the doldrums, floating on the seas. Who knows what tomorrow will bring? I certainly don't. I thought I was moving forward... but the reality is, I don't know what direction I'm going. For now I suppose I will float and hope, and maybe the right current will flow me along to the next thing.
It strikes me that I created this blog to talk about things... but all I really do is talk about myself. Maybe I'm at a transitional stage and I have to deal with this stage first... but what I really want to do is talk about interesting things. This diary type stuff, while useful in sorting my thoughts, feels far too much like a self-made pity party. Lets try for something a little more upbeat next time, shall we?
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