Talked to a friend of mine. One of the few people I can use as a sounding board for my ideas; wonderful people to have around, help to keep you on the straight and narrow path that is your sanity. Thanks to you guys.
It comes down to this, there are shop-boys and there are boys that work in shops. I'm not back home trapped, I'm here tying up lose ends, making my life ready for the next step. I've been in college for 8 years with the year I took off, and the year I spent overseas, and the 2 years or so where I only went part time; it makes sense then that I have to be here to make everything ready. Then, I'm free to live my life, I don't have to stay here and farm just because I grew up on the farm in the country. =) Different influences yield different results, ergo the me I am in Europe is necessarily different than the me on the farm; I'm not going to deflate or explode and find out I'm not who I think I am, I'm just here working in the shop so to speak. Then I'll find some way to go back to Europe. Almost all of my friends here and all of my friends from all over Europe have told me it's where I belong; I believe them and have thought the same myself for some time. So, that's that, I feel happy again to be me and life is worth living again. =)
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